In today’s day and age being a gentleman isn’t a high priority for most men. Most men are more interested in having “swag” and being “cool” among others their age, however I believe there are still some guys who want to be that perfect gentleman, so here is my perspective about what it takes to be a gentleman. Most of my points have ended up being about the dating phase of a relationship, though I think a lot of the points can be transferred to those who are already in an established relationship.
- Dress with class. It is alright to wear jeans rather than trousers but think about how you are wearing them – wearing them around your ankles isn’t particularly attractive. In addition, pair your jeans with a shirt for a smart-casual look. While a shirt may not be as comfortable as a lazy-day t-shirt or an oversized hoodie, it oozes a certain level of sophistication.
- Offer to pay. If you have invited a woman on a date, you should pay. No woman wants to be invited on a date and then be asked to pay! If she has invited you on a date, in my mind that means she should pay, however this may not always be the case so make sure you have your wallet on you just in case.
- Pay her compliments, but don’t go overboard! I think it is nice to hear a genuine compliment, especially when I am on a date with my boyfriend or have made more of an effort to get dressed up. Try and make your complements specific to the person you are with and remember that class is best; don’t compliment her boobs or her butt!
- Be mindful of where you put your hands. This one is super-important to me. You can always tell how much a man respects a woman by where he puts his hands. If he puts his hands all over her body, or even on an exposed area of her skin other than her arms or hands, it doesn’t convey much respect. However, if he is careful about where he places his hands and keeps them on covered areas of her skin, it oozes respect. Just look at the tumblr response for this Tom Hiddleston/Emma Watson picture.
- Give her 100% of your attention. This one goes without saying. When you are with her, you want her to know that she is the only thing on your mind. I think this is important for couples in a relationship as well as couples who are just going on a few dates.
- Listen. Another important one for people who are in a relationship as well. Listen to what she is saying and ask questions about her. The majority of people like talking about themselves so use that to your advantage and ask her about her siblings, pets, hobbies, everything!
- Don’t put any pressure on her. Whether you’re asking her on a date or leaning in for a kiss at the end of the night, don’t put any pressure on her to say yes. Let her know that you are OK to take things slowly and at a pace that she is comfortable with. Conversely, if you are the one who wants to take things slow, let her know. If she isn’t OK with that, she isn’t the one for you.
- Kiss her on the forehead. Make sure this is inline with number seven as unwanted contact is incredibly unattractive, but I think it is so sweet to be kissed on the forehead. It is such a sweet and innocent act and it really shows respect.
- Watch what you say. Another incredibly important one. I know that I, personally, am not attracted to people who swear or make bigoted comments as this makes me feel uncomfortable so be mindful about what is coming out of your mouth. Don’t swear, don’t criticise the waiter and most importantly don’t make any “ist” comments (racist, sexist, etc).
- Hold the door open for her, pull back her seat, walk closest to the road. These are all classic gentleman acts that scream class and elegance and I know that I love it when my boyfriend consciously does these acts.
I hope you have enjoyed reading my post, whether you are male or female. I hope the men have learned a little something about how to be a gentleman from a lady’s perspective and the ladies agree that these are all classic signs of a gentleman. Do you agree with everything I have mentioned? Can you think of some more points?
– Taisie ♥